Author: Alex

The River of Styx — Turmoil
Alex Hinders. 2011.
Colored pencils and pen.

The River of Styx — Woe
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Colored pencils and pen.

The River of Styx was one of five rivers that separated the world of the living from the world of the dead in Greek mythology. When people think of Styx it often brings to mind the ancient practice of putting a coin in a deceased person’s mouth so that they could pay the ferryman, Charon, to take them across the rivers and into the underworld proper. Those that couldn’t pay their fare were not allowed into the underworld and were left to just wander about just on the other side of death but not quite into the afterlife. (Technically Styx wasn’t on Charon’s route; Charon mainly operated on the Acheron.)

I’m pretty sure that these two drawings both represent me. At the time I did these drawings I had just accepted that my break-up with the Purple Girl was final; I had also just moved out of an apartment building I had lived in for a year. Before I wrote this post I had always wondered why I was crossing the River of Styx – after all, I was rapidly recovering from a long depression! I was more alive than I had been in years. But thinking about Styx as a divider between the living and the dead makes sense when you factor in my break-up. The break-up represented death and I was no longer waiting along the ‘dreary coast’ and was in the process of crossing into the next land.

The Mermaid, The Fish, and the Sailor
Alex Hinders. 2007.
Colored pencils and pen.

Unrequited love has got to be one of the most awful things in the world to experience. It’s not like anybody looks at a rational list of pros and cons and decides, “Yes, I think I will fall in love with this person.” It just sort of happens; love ensnares you. But sometimes love only snares one of two people. Instead of love becoming a sort of shared madness, a world which two-people co-inhabit, it becomes a glass cage in which one person can only look outwards at the person who cannot share this love.
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I met her my junior year in high school, in 2004; I had fallen in love with her before the year turned into 2005. I wasn’t freed of that unrequited love until 2009 although I didn’t even realize my freedom until the year 2010. It didn’t stop me from exploring other options and attempting to court other girls in the years between — but it also didn’t stop my mind from slowly wandering back to her after each new crush faded. Part of the cosmic injustice of unrequited love is that it’s nobody’s fault. It’s not her fault she had no feelings for me; she was a straight girl. It’s not my fault I had feelings for her. Sometimes I’ve wondered if it was my fault that the love didn’t leave me, but really, I would have been ecstatic if it would have left me. No rational person thinks to themselves, “Yes, I think it is in my best interests to remain hopelessly in love with someone I can never have.”

So in the end, the whole thing was just what it was; another random event in a universe ruled by chaos. Galaxies are born and die for no real reason and sometimes a person falls in love for that same random reason. Isn’t it wonderful?

Also regarding the drawing: I was the sailor, she was the mermaid, and the red fish was the boy she was in love with. I wish I had a higher quality scan of this drawing. I’ll have to hunt down the original someday, if it still exists.

Three Days in Bed, Pts. I, II, and III
Alex Hinders. 2012.
Colored Pencil and pen.

So clearly they work! The most popular mineral water spring is in the small town of get viagra prescription the Czech Republic called Karlovy Vary. Silagra is levitra samples djpaulkom.tv a godlike medication that can be used to cover the sexual problem known as erectile dysfunction. Original cheapest viagra no prescription is extremely expensive and not simply obtainable, while the generic category of cialis is comparatively economical and can be used directly by purchasing from the store. You will be very smart to use pharmacy viagra http://djpaulkom.tv/and-also-a-personal-game-core-much-too/ when you are certain that nothing else is wrong with you. These three images represent three days I stayed in bed this previous February. The three days weren’t consecutive — they happened over the course of a week. To the people that asked I told them I was sick but the truth was I was just too depressed to leave my room on those days. Meanwhile, the only thing I could think about doing was leaving my room and going outside; I was longing for the spring to come.

I’ve tried to interpret why I’m on a stage in these three drawings. In the past I was involved with the theatre and even studied it as a minor in college but I’ve more or less left that world behind these days. After much personal reflection, I think I’ve figured out why the theatre is in these drawings. In order to understand it you’ll have to follow a string of logic from my own un-conscious mind. Ready? First, it recalls the old Shakespeare quote “all the world’s a stage”, which is the start of a monologue in the play As You Like It. Which leads my mind to a song lyric from Ian Hunter: “And all the world’s a stage / ‘cept that I ain’t on it anymore, anymore.” (The song is Dead Man Walking from his album titled Rant.) Hunter’s voice is filled with the same kind of melancholy I was feeling at the time. However, even though I was lamenting about how I wasn’t on the stage, I was on the stage. It’s just that I spent that time in a passive way.

A less round-about way of explaining these drawings would be to say that they’re about lost time. We only have so much time on this earth — on this stage — and it’s up to us on how we spent it. Those three days of mine were spent actively regretting the time I was wasting. Obviously not the most rational thing to do, but this is what depression can do to a person. The drawings are a sort of self-mockery of those three days.

But here’s the damnedest thing: if I wouldn’t have spent those three days in bed, the inspiration for these drawings wouldn’t have come around and I wouldn’t have learned a lesson in wasting time!

Angel Camel
Alex Hinders. 2008.
Pen, Paper, and computer.

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This is the same image as the previous one after it has been rotated to the left 90 degrees.The camel is just a camel head cushioned by straw.